Motherhood Perfection Syndrome Myth Busters

In “Motherhood Perfection Syndrome Myth Busters?” episode #112, Meredith Curtis exposes lies moms believe that define who they are with a false narrative. For each lie, Meredith reveals the truth that brings freedom! Moms don’t have to struggle under the weight of constantly striving but never measuring up. In Christ, there is grace to walk out your calling with poise, grace, and dignity. Be encouraged as you listen to this podcast!

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Show Notes

Motherhood has a way of shaping and defining us. It reveals the virtues and flaws in our character. It forces us to run to Jesus for help, wisdom, and strength.

I talk to so many mothers who feel discouraged and weary. They long to be perfect mothers and often believe lies about themselves, their children, and their ability to parent.

Jesus has overcome the lies of the enemy!

With those truths in mind, let’s examine some of the lies that have weighed you down and hindered your ability to mother the precious treasures God has given you.

I’m the Wrong Person to Raise this Child

Yes, every Mom has wondered if God made a mistake. Maybe the child is brilliant and you are just average in intelligence. Maybe the child is musically gifted and you can’t even clap in time with music. Maybe the child is so strong-willed and you are weary from disciplining him.

God chose you!

Two examples from Scripture that I want to share with you: Abraham and Esther.

The Lord also chose you to raise this child.

I’m Ruining My Kids

All Moms feel this way at some point. They may be struggling with anger or sadness and taking it out on the children.

The sad truth is that you will blow it and make many mistakes.

Here’s another truth: It’s not all about you. God is bigger than your flaws and shortcomings. He will actually pour out grace in your weakness and turn everything around for good. Even though you will never be a perfect Mom, you will not ruin your children if you look to Jesus. Even the hurts can open our child’s eyes to see that they need a perfect parent.

In mothering, as we surrender to Him, he will love and train through us. You see, children don’t need perfect parents, they need parents who look to Jesus.

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me” (II Corinthians 12:9 NASB).

If I Love My Children, They Will Love Me Back & Meet My Emotional Needs

Let me just be honest here. Your children don’t know how to love, yet. They are learning to love from the way you love them unconditionally. Their emotions run hot and cold.

You must be the stable one.

Moms can’t look for children to meet their emotional needs. Motherhood is a one-way street.

Need some help in that department? I know someone who loved and loved and loved before His children finally loved Him back. He can love through you.

“We love because he first loved us” (I John 4:19 NASB).

I Can’t Control My Children without Raising my Voice

It can feel that we have more power when our voice is loud, but it is really the opposite.

If children don’t obey immediately then give a gentle consequence. When you address disobedience quickly, you will find that you don’t get to the point of anger.

Giving a gentle answer and tone of voice can be learned.

I Should Focus on Keeping My Children Happy

If you spend your time trying to keep your children happy, you will raise self-centered children who live to have fun no matter who they hurt.

It is wise to focus on teaching children to know and live for Jesus rather than trying to make them happy. Happiness is a byproduct.

When the disciples were excited at how the Lord used them to drive out demons, Jesus reminded them not to seek happiness in circumstances, but to rejoice because we belong to the Lord. True happiness comes from knowing that we are loved.

“Jesus replied, ‘I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven. I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you. However, do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven” (Luke 10:18-20 NASB).

If I’m Doing Everything Right, Motherhood will be Easy

The Bible doesn’t ever say that life will be easy. In fact, if you read the book of Hebrews, you will meet heroes of the faith that have endured tons of hardship.

Even Jesus assured us that we will have troubles.

The good news is that Jesus has overcome the world! This brings us peace when motherhood is hard.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world” (John 16:33 NASB).

All The Other Moms Know What they are Doing

I have talked to countless mothers who feel scared and insecure. In fact, most mothers want to grow into better mothers, even those that seem practically perfect.

If you struggle with insecurity or fears, you are not alone.

All mothers need encouragement. Don’t be intimidated by other mothers. Learn from their mothering strengths, but realize that they need encouragement, too.

“Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching” (Hebrews 10:23-25 NASB).