My Kids Fight

Hate to disappoint you. We are not a perfect, Christian, homeschool family. Well, we do homeschool and we are Christians … but the perfect part? Therein lies the problem. You see many of us have these high hopes that homeschooling will insure that our kids get along – or that at the very least, will learn how to get along. Of course when things don’t work out the way we expect we are floored.

My Kids Fight! Out of five children there have been arguing and fighting at different times during their lives. Sometimes it was the oldest and the youngest. Other times it was the two youngest. I remember once being so frustrated that I made my oldest two, my son and my daughter sit face-to-face until they could “stand” to be around each other. Their words were “I can’t stand to be around him/her.” Well, that took care of them saying those offending words. The rest took work.

However, I began to see a pattern emerging…one child in particular had difficulty getting along with…well, everyone. My difficult child is a handful. He was a handful as young and even as he got older and we found he struggled academically. Mine was tough love. I expected allot from him, and often he delivered. One thing he learned—and that was to be detail oriented, when it came to what others in the family should and should not do. Unfortunately this perfectionism wasn’t applied to his own life.

Do your kids fight? Homeschooling isn't a magic wand. Our kids are still human. Tips and guidance to help you through.

I know – it’s easy to cry, “Help! My Kids Don’t Get Along!” After the relief that comes with getting it off my chest, I decided some things needed to change and namely me.

  • The way I reacted.
  • The discipline I meted out.
  • The realization that yelling did not help.

I quickly learned that micro-managing could only go so far. I once heard a seminar given by a renowned child discipline advocate that stated when the child is young redistricting bad behavior is necessary but as the child grew we, as parents could relax a bit more. This did not happen in this child’s case. Teaching him self-control proved to be a formidable task and sadly is ongoing. So, what do you do with the difficult child? Or children in general that do not get along? Here are a few of my go-to methods for those times that I am at wits end.

My short list on child behavior modifying techniques:

  1. Pray: When I’m at a loss I ask the Lord in prayer for help, even when it comes to the perfect punishment. HE has been amazing with HIS answers… and believe me, some were short of miraculous in nature in their effectiveness. [Listen to the podcast here for details.]
  2. Punishment vs. Crime: Be sure the punishment fits the “crime” … if your child misbehaves at dinner consider having them eat a cold dinner alone, or doing the dishes. My teenage son has done many dishes when it is not his turn due to causing a fight at the dinner table, or acting rudely. This of course is spelled out way in advance.
  3. Tell your kids what to expect: if you are going into a store, make sure they know to keep their hands behind their backs when looking at things or IN their pockets for little ones. Older children know ahead of time if they break something they will pay for it. Just be clear of expectations.
  4. Make sure you child understands what the punishment will be. If that is not a deterrent, think of another punishment. [You can’t (well you can but it does not go over very well) come up with punishments on the fly… often the punishment is out of anger or frustration and will not curb the event from happening again.]
  5. Repeat back: often I ask my kids to tell me what I said. In that way there is no confusion or the words, “I didn’t know that is what you said!” It is clear to all.
  6. Keep it short. Long explanations are often tuned out – after the first two minutes. Keep it brief and on target.
  7. Encourage. When a child is doing something good, let them know you appreciate it. Catch them and reward good behavior.
  8. Mentor: some children need extra work and practice. When children are young, practice calling their name and having them walk or run toward you. Reward this with a hug and praise. The same thing with hand holding. My grandkids hate to hold hands in the parking lot and I witnessed an accident as a child in the parking lot. So, when they are with me they know to hold my hand, or they will not be allowed to go.
  9. Prepare: Are you prepared to turn the car around on the way to a fun field trip if your children will not behave in the car? Are you prepared to pull off the road when you need to discipline. Believe me, I’ve done both of these things and the reactions are astounding, loud, and are not repeated. It only takes one time of us being firm for our kids to get the idea and respond.
  10. Relax/Anger: parenting isn’t easy. It doesn’t stop. It doesn’t get easier… little kids, little problems, big kids, big problems. Righteous anger is fine – reacting out of anger rarely works out well for either party. Be sure your life is filled with prayer and rely on God for that extra strength that is sometimes needed to get through the day!

Remember the saying, “Rome wasn’t built in one day.” It is worth repeating and remembering. Parenting is an ongoing effort and in the process we learn about ourselves, our children and best of all, if done correctly our memories will be wonderful and lasting.

 

 

Need Money For Homeschool Books?

Need money for homeschool books? After all the years of homeschooling I added up the amount of money I’ve spent and let’s just say, I could be driving a luxury car. I’ve homeschooled since 1986 and in that time I’ve purchased thousands and thousands of dollars in curriculum. It was everything from books to math videos (in the hundreds of dollars) to games (one year I spent over $500 in educational games) to educational computer software (thousands – pre-internet) and educational videos.

Where did all these resources go? I made good use of them and still are recycling and using many of those long-ago-purchased products today. That is not to say that I purchased things unwisely or that many books were never used. In this case I often passed them on in homeschool curriculum sales or gave them to friends. There are some things that I believe every homeschool needs and even if there are freebies on the internet, these sources I believe are invaluable.

In fact I’ve created several shows using just books, you know the ones you find in the library. Yes, there are some great ones available. And I love to put lists together. Here is a list of Summer Reading Books, here is a podcast on Living Books, and here is one on creating (and charging others) a Living Books Library. 

Need money for homeschool books

 

What are my MUST haves for every homeschooler?

  1. A Bible that is age appropriate for each child
  2. A good atlas that is grade appropriate.
  3. A historic timeline.
  4. A dictionary (yes, I realize they can hop online but it makes a good reference for those times when the internet – {{gasp}} – is down!
  5. Reading material – historical fiction, biographies, classics, religious titles

That is my short list. My book shelves are floor to ceiling and filled with books and curriculum I’ve collected throughout the years. Many of my favorite resources are no longer in print however they are available online if you dig far enough. I’ll soon post some of my suggestions in an upcoming post. No matter how much I’ve spent buying good curriculum it is still cheaper than private schools and I’m delighted with my children’s educational milestones, and would NOT trade homeschooling for anything in the world!

And – one more thing  – seminars! Right now our seminar bundle is free – grab your set by subscribing to the email list for the network.  And you receive weekly freebies just for our subscribers as a BONUS .

Our bundles change every few months – so that’s more savings just for you.

And, just in time for the shopping season, I’m offering a flash giveaway, (ends 5/24/2017 at 8 am est) Don’t forget to check out the Media Angels website for specials – we have them all the time, and coupon offers to eZine subscribers as well.

So, let me know what you do to save money and visit Carol Topp’s podcast here for great info – about the Myths that Homeschool Moms believe – here.  A real eye opener.

 

Curriculum On The Cheap

curriculum on the cheap | Do you know the best place to buy curriculum on the cheap? In this podcast, Felice and Gina discuss the basic ideas behind curriculum Let’s Talk About Curriculum Ideas On The Cheap with Felice Gerwitz and Special Guest, Gina Glenn

Podcast 199

Do you know the best place to buy curriculum on the cheap? In this podcast, Felice and Gina discuss the basic ideas behind curriculum and how to find wonderful ways to purchase great curriculum without breaking the bank.

Please share our show with your friends! And rate us on iTunes, GooglePlay or your favorite podcast app.

Podcasts you may enjoy related to today’s session:

How to choose homeschool curriculum

Using movies as curriculum

How do you choose good books?

Living Books

Living Books Library

Show Notes: Curriculum Ideas On The Cheap

  1. What is your homeschool philosophy? If you don’t know, how can you purchase curriculum?
  2. Join your favorite curriculum companies newsletter. Often you will receive first-hand knowledge of upcoming sales or discounts.
  3. Do your homework. What works for your best friend may not work for you.
  4. Used bookstores or homeschool consignment stores
  5. Library Sales
  6. Living books from original sources – library or book trade
  7. Start your own trading library of resources
  8. Unit studies – you can use these over multi-grades for multi-years.
  9. Project Gutenberg, Google Books
  10. Audios books – library or online
  11. Loyal Books
  12. Lists of great books: AmblesideOnline.org

 

Graduation On The Cheap

Homeschooling families can benefit from frugal ideas for graduation | graduation on the cheapLet’s Talk About Graduation On The Cheap with Felice Gerwitz and Meredith Curtis

Podcast 196

We have graduation on the cheap ideas – are you ready? Have you started your high school graduation party plans yet? No worries! We’ve got you covered. Inexpensive graduation ideas are our specialty. Meredith has graduated five children and Felice four so between them, they have quite an arsenal of ideas that you can implement even if you waited until the last minute. Grab your notepad and listen in.

Be sure to share our show with you friends – and rate us on iTunes, GooglePlay or your favorite podcast app.

Show Notes: Graduation On The Cheap

  1. Location: churches, park, church fellowship hall, party at home
  2. Invitations – VistaPrint, at home computer
  3. Food
  4. Decorations
  5. Personal Touch

We discussed deciding on the type of graduation you want, planning the type of graduation early and saving up money. Pray about the type of graduation that is right for you. Include your teens as well.

More great ideas

  • Food -finger foods – fun: candy bars – ice cream with toppings
  • Open house – visiting times staggers friends
  • Photo booth with props for teens
  • Personal touch – poster boards, items important to the teen

Sponsor:

The BIGGEST Homeschool Sale of the Year - ends 5/30/17

Chaotic Bliss Homeschooling