“Didn’t Your Kids Fight?” – MBFLP 314

November 12, 2025 by Leave a Comment

(Stock Image: Deposit Photos)

Most of our eight kids are adults now and we are so blessed to have good relationships with all of them – and they all get along with their siblings, too!  Some people ask if they’ve always been peaceable, and we have to say NOPE. But we found several things along the way that helped shape the sort of family we have today – that’s the subject of this episode!

References 

Where do wars and fights come from among you? Do they not come from your desires for pleasure that war in your members? You lust and do not have. You murder and covet and cannot obtain. You fight and war. Yet you do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss, that you may spend it on your pleasures.  (James 4:1-3)

“You shall not hate your brother in your heart. You shall surely rebuke your neighbor, and not bear sin because of him.You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the children of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the LORD.” (God, in Leviticus 19:17-18)

“Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that ‘by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.’”
(Jesus, in Matthew 18:15-16)

One of our favorite resources:
 “The Brother Offended Checklist” (Doorposts)

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MBFLP – Romance Once You’ve Got Kids (Replay)

January 7, 2025 by Leave a Comment

MBFLP - Romance Once You've Got KidsRomance After You Have Kids: Rediscovering Love in the Busy Season of LifeValentine’s Day is just around the corner—a time traditionally associated with grand gestures, candlelit dinners, and extravagant gifts. But what happens when you’re knee-deep in diapers, laundry, and homeschooling? Is romance doomed to take a backseat?If this sounds familiar, don’t worry—you’re not alone. Many parents of young children feel the pressure of balancing family life with maintaining a strong and loving marriage. The good news? Romance doesn’t have to disappear—it just needs to look a little different.

Romance Once You’ve Got Kids

Valentine’s Day is on the horizon and for parents with small children, no money for a sitter, and no relatives nearby, the response might be “So what?” It can be discouraging when the world is full of ads urging dinner out, expensive jewelry, and barrels of roses, when your life is more about diapers and phonics, and your budget is more of the dollar menu and less of filet mignon. This episode, we talk about finding romance in real life, wherever it may be – and sometimes, it will surprise you where it can be found!

Sponsored by Now Programs.

Show Notes for Romance Once You’ve Got Kids

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner—a time traditionally associated with grand gestures, candlelit dinners, and extravagant gifts. But what happens when you’re knee-deep in diapers, laundry, and homeschooling? Is romance doomed to take a backseat?

If this sounds familiar, don’t worry—you’re not alone. Many parents of young children feel the pressure of balancing family life with maintaining a strong and loving marriage. The good news? Romance doesn’t have to disappear—it just needs to look a little different.

Redefining Expectations

When you have small children, it’s easy to feel disconnected from the glittering Valentine’s Day ads showcasing fine dining and luxury gifts. Between budget constraints, finding babysitters, and the sheer exhaustion of parenting, these expectations can feel out of reach. But here’s the truth: Romance isn’t about meeting societal standards. It’s about strengthening your bond as a couple and celebrating the love God has given you.

As Hal and Melanie Young point out in their podcast Making Biblical Family Life Practical, the key is to focus on your relationship—not on what the world says it should look like. You don’t have to please anyone except each other and God.

Finding Creative Ways to Celebrate

Even with young children underfoot, you can create meaningful moments of connection. Here are a few ideas from Hal and Melanie to keep the spark alive:

  1. Homemade Valentine’s Cards
    Involve your children by making cards together. Not only is this budget-friendly, but it’s also a way to include your family in the celebration. Bonus: Crafting cards for each other can become a sweet and personal tradition.
  2. Date Nights at Home
    If going out isn’t an option, create a special evening at home. Put the kids to bed early or let them have a movie night in another room while you enjoy a candlelit dinner for two.
  3. Romantic Nostalgia
    Revisit your wedding video, flip through old photo albums, or retell your love story to your kids. It’s a beautiful way to honor your history and show your children the foundation of your family.
  4. Parent Swaps or Babysitting Trades
    Partner with trusted friends or family members to trade babysitting duties. This can free up time for you and your spouse to reconnect without distractions.

Building Romance Daily

True romance is about more than a single day on the calendar. It’s cultivated through small, consistent acts of love and kindness. Simple gestures like leaving a note, offering a sincere compliment, or cooking your spouse’s favorite meal can go a long way in keeping your connection strong.

Hal and Melanie emphasize the importance of trust and selflessness in marriage. As they shared, “Trust is built through a long sequence of consideration, courtesy, and self-sacrifice.” These everyday acts create a bond that’s deeper and more enduring than any store-bought gift.

Letting Your Kids Witness Love

It’s good for your children to see your affection and appreciation for each other. Whether it’s a quick hug in the kitchen or sharing a laugh at the dinner table, these moments show your kids that marriage is joyful, loving, and worth celebrating. You’re modeling a biblical and healthy relationship for them to aspire to in their own lives.

Embracing the Season You’re In

Parenting young children is one of the busiest, most demanding seasons of life. It’s okay to be creative and flexible with how you celebrate romance. This season will pass quickly, and there will be opportunities for grand getaways and fancy dinners in the future. For now, focus on maintaining and nurturing your relationship in the ways that matter most.

As Hal wisely advises, “Find romance where you can—whether it’s during the kids’ nap time or over coffee in the early morning.” The important thing is to stay connected and enjoy the journey together.

Bonus Resource

Looking for more tips on rekindling romance during the busy parenting years? Download Hal and Melanie’s workshop Romance for the Exhausted at raisingrealmen.com/valentines-day-freebie. You’ll also find a special Valentine’s Day deal featuring their book My Beloved, My Friend and other marriage-strengthening resources.

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Training Our Children – Flourish at Home

February 28, 2024 by Leave a Comment
Training Your Children Flourish At Home

Flourish At Home

Training Your Children

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Curious about training your children? People often ask me how I manage to homeschool and run a home business as a single mom. One of the most important factors is that I have taught my sons how to run the household. In this episode, I’ll talk about how to train your children to be independent and responsible, how to take initiative, and how to serve others cheerfully. These four things will prepare your children well for adulthood and contribute greatly to building a balanced life for your whole family now.

These sample chore charts will give you an idea of how I allocated housework and other responsibilities among my sons at different stages of our family life:

Sample Chore Charts

How do YOU teach your children responsibility, independence, initiative, and service? After you listen to the podcast, please leave a comment and share your best tips with us!

Listen to these podcasts for additional resources:

Homeschool Lifestyle
Last Minute DIY Tips
Money Saving Field Trips
All About Teaching
Raising Spiritually Strong Kids
Six Homeschooling Insider Tips
Best Staycations for Kids
Avoid Curriculum Pitfalls
Top 10 Parenting Secrets
45 Family Date Night Ideas

Thanks to our sponsor, Harper Collins Christian, and the Kingdom Girl’s Bible

Girls will discover the power of faith in this beautiful Bible that features women of the Bible. This is the ideal Bible for girls on their journey of faith! This special Bible is specifically crafted to highlight the stories and lessons of the inspiring, famous, and sometimes infamous women of the Bible. With over 400 engaging features, colorful illustrations, and helpful notes, this Bible is perfect for girls ages 8 to 12 as they learn about the strong and faithful women who came before them. Visit the website for more information.

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Building a Godly Legacy: Ken Ham Interview – MBFLP 255

January 12, 2021 by Leave a Comment

Welcome to the new year! Glad as we may be to see the old year passing, the challenges to our families never change. As the world around us becomes more hostile to Christian teaching, how do we prepare our children to walk in faith when they leave our home? What sort of foundation can we lay to give them a base to stand on?

We kick off our 2021 season with a conversation with Ken Ham of Answers in Genesis. Ken is famous for defending Biblical creationism and the historicity of Genesis, but he also writes and speaks on family issues. His book Already Gone looked at why children and young adults leave the faith they grew up in. A second book, Already Compromised,  examines how colleges and universities drift away from their foundations, too, and how parents should guide their children’s educational choices after high school.

“Parenting Kids to Face the Giants”

But his newest book is a more personal account of how parents can build a godly legacy in their family. Will They Stand shares the importance of raising strong believers from childhood forward, preparing them to hold fast against a hostile culture outside the home and the church.

continued …

<id=”nextpart”>In the first half of this two-part interview, we talk with Ken about the foundation his father laid for him and his siblings, then how Ken and his wife Mally have kept Biblical principles central to their family. He centers his argument on a constant, intentional approach with an eye to future generations:

“Please understand that you too will leave a legacy to the generations to follow. They may not build memorials to you, and it’s unlikely that they will place signs outside of the place of your birth … but what you leave behind will forever impact the hearts and souls of those in your family and beyond. You will leave a legacy; the only question is what kind of legacy it will be.” (from the book, p. 63)

Passages and Resources We Mentioned

Ephesians 6:4 – And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.

Psalm 78:5 – For he [God] established a testimony in Jacob, and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers, that they should make them known to their children

2 Timothy 3:15 – from childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus

Colossians 2:2-3 – Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge

Answers in Genesis

Ken’s new book, Will They Stand: Parenting Kids to Face the GIANTS

Ken Ham and Britt Beemer, Already Gone: Why Your Kids Will Quit Church and What You Can Do to Stop It

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Raising Kids Who Keep the Faith: Israel Wayne Interview – MBFLP 248

May 20, 2020 by Leave a Comment

This episode, we’re talking with Israel Wayne, homeschool graduate, father of ten, and author of the new book Raising Them Up: Parenting for Christians. He shares some of the difficulties of his childhood – parents who divorced early, an abusive stepfather, times of poverty and homelessness – and the incredible way that God has redeemed that experience for His glory and the help of His people! You’ll enjoy this surprising and encouraging conversation with Family Renewal’s Israel Wayne.

Starting Over After a Rough Start

“When I got married, I was twenty-three, my wife was twenty, and we started our marriage with a clean slate,” Israel said. “I didn’t bring the baggage with me. I had the opportunity to start out on the right foot, developing the kind of relationship with my wife that my parents never had, learning how to be the father that my father wasn’t able to be. We now have ten children – our oldest is 20, our youngest is 16 months – five boys and five girls. And I think it’s really interesting, fascinating, and ironic in a way, that God has given us this ministry called “Family Renewal.

“This may be surprising to some people because some don’t know much about my back story. But I really believe in the capacity of God to reach families that are broken and families that don’t feel like there’s hope for them, that feel like, “Well, yeah, we’re not that poster family for homeschooling or ‘a Christian family.’ I believe that God’s grace is big enough that God can reach even you, and I believe my background leads me to have faith for those families. It’s part of why I do what I do and why I wrote Raising Them Up: Parenting for Christians.”

Not Available on Amazon!

Raising Them Up: Parenting for Christians is available direct from Family Renewal Ministries

CLICK HERE to order your copy! 

While We’re On The Subject

During this time of widespread shutdown and isolation, a lot of authors, teachers, and publishers are struggling. Dozens of homeschool conventions have been cancelled, including some of the largest in the United States and Canada, and that has made a serious dent in the support your favorite homeschool vendors need to keep going.

When you’re ordering online – and who isn’t, now? – would you take a minute and consider ordering direct from the authors and publishers? You might not know that when you save a dollar on a book at the (ahem) online megastore, 75% of the income from that book goes to the website owner – not the author. In normal times that’s just business reality – but while the crisis lasts, remember the creators who are pouring their heart and knowledge into your family and homeschool, and let’s channel those purchases back to the homeschool vendors you depend on!

GREAT NEWS!

 

Our book

NO LONGER LITTLE: Parenting Tweens with Grace and Hope

has received the

2020 CHRISTIAN INDIE AWARD

for the Relationships and Family category

“The Christian Indie Awards honor Christian books by independent authors and small publishers for outstanding contribution to Christian life.”

 

Awarded by the Christian Indie Publishing Association (formerly the Christian Small Publishers Association)

CLICK HERE to find out more, or order your copy! Available in print, audio CD, and downloadable formats

 

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When It’s Time They Were Moving Out – MBFLP 242

February 21, 2020 by Leave a Comment

“What ever happened to growing up and moving out?” someone asked. The fact is, a growing number of young adults are living at home with their parents. Is this a problem? Well, sometimes yes, but sometimes not at all. This episode, we’re talking about how to work through the young adults leaving Mom and Dad’s home for a place of their own.

Back Home Again

The U.S. Census Bureau reports that in 1969, less than 10% of young men (ages 25-34) lived at home with their parents – and more than 80% were married and living with their wife. In 2019, though, nearly 20% are back home (or still at home) with Mom and Dad, and only 36% are married.1

There are many reasons that may be so, but popular wisdom aside, it’s not necessarily a sign of failure or character weakness when a young adult is living in “the natal household,” as one researcher puts it.

3:15 – Census figures on young adults and their living arrangements

5:45 – Reasons good kids may still be living at home

7:30 – How can we prepare our kids to be independent adults

15:25 – A word from our sponsor

16:25 – The importance of the parent-child relationship during this transition

18:11 – How to handle a young adult who puts the family at risk

22:00 – When your adult child wants to move out and you the parent are holding him or her back

25:55 – How to help a young adult who’s “stuck”
You might be interested …

Escaping the Endless Adolescence: How We Can Help Our Teenagers Grow Up Before They Grow Old
Joseph Allen and Claudia Worrell Allen

Engaging Today’s Prodigal
Carol Barnier

References

  1. Source: U.S. Census Bureau, Current Population Survey, Annual Social and Economic Supplement, 1967 to present; table AD3, “Living Arrangements of Adults 25 to 34 Years Old, 1967 to Present”

This episode brought to you in part by

Real tools. Real skills.

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The Importance of Fun – MBFLP 224

May 1, 2019 by Leave a Comment

Who said school can’t be fun? This episode, we sit down with our friends Roger and Jan Smith, long-time homeschool parents and leaders in Louisiana. The topic is simply, “Fun” – what it can do to create memories, bond family members, and make learning a lot more enjoyable for parents and students alike!

Recently we visited with Roger and Jan Smith, leaders in the Louisiana homeschool community and dear friends of ours. One evening our family and our friends were playing a fast-paced game together, laughing hysterically, and thinking about what an important, bonding thing that is.

We were noticing how well our teenagers interacted with the adults in the room, and the obvious respect going in both directions, and we were talking later about how the shared experiences build that sort of relationship. They’re more and more important as we all become more individualized and isolated, focusing on our work and entertainment through private screens—even when we’re in the same room, we’re not interacting.

That’s one reason we love audiobooks when we’re driving or working together, because the whole family can share that experience and have a basis for conversations later. It’s a good reason for reading aloud together, even when the children are reading well on their own. We try and make intentional choices to do things together so in later years, our adult children will have memories that draw them back to their family home.

Another thing we do is make a big deal over family holidays. Birthdays are an example. In our home, the one we’re celebrating gets to choose the family menu for the day. At supper, we center the conversation on memories of the birthday person. Afterward, we take turns sharing things we love or admire about them. It’s really touching – everyone loves being appreciated, and it’s very easy to overlook the chances to communicate that respect.

A Sense of Humor

Shared humor is another thing we look for. A study of newlywed couples noticed how they interacted, especially the moments of humor in the midst of a problem. It defuses situations and reduces tension if we can refer to a shared joke or inside story. It’s a sign of a healthy relationship if you can still smile, if you can still laugh, if you can lighten up in the midst of your stress. That applies to your kids as well as your mate!

In fact, that study really pointed out that our relationships are formed from the moments we share. Little things count. It’s not like you have to learn a new language to really score points with your kids. Instead, you just need to  hear when they speak, make eye contact, and come back with a positive response.

And that’s something you get a dozen times a day to do. If you miss one, just determine to catch the next. It’s something you can build up without feeling like you have to make a huge investment before you see any benefit.

(Listen in for more great ideas about building memories and relationships with your family!)

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Flourish at Home – Training Our Children

October 10, 2018 by Leave a Comment
Flourish At Home

Flourish At Home

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People often ask me how I manage to homeschool and run a home business as a single mom. One of the most important factors is that I have taught my sons how to run the household. In this episode, I’ll talk about how to train your children to be independent and responsible, how to take initiative, and how to serve others cheerfully. These four things will prepare your children well for adulthood and contribute greatly to building a balanced life for your whole family now.

These sample chore charts will give you an idea of how I allocated housework and other responsibilities among my sons at different stages of our family life:

Training Your Children – Sample Chore Charts

How do YOU teach your children responsibility, independence, initiative, and service? After you listen to the podcast, please leave a comment and share your best tips with us!

Joyful Balance for Busy Moms

Are you exhausted? Overloaded? Teetering on the brink of burnout? Whether you’re a stay-at-home mom, work-at-home mom, or homeschooling mom, it’s easy to be paralyzed by an overwhelming to-do list. False guilt only adds to the burden.

Mary Jo Tate—an international editor, book coach, and veteran homeschooling mom of four boys—wants to help you find peace in the space between the ideal and reality so you can stop struggling and start flourishing. Learn how to:

· Stop the juggling act and find a balance you can live with
· Minimize interruptions while being sensitive to real needs
· Take care of yourself so you can take care of your family
· Value and protect your time to do what matters most
· Establish a pace you can maintain for the marathon of life

Visit the show page for replays here

Special Thanks to Our Network Sponsor – Change is in the Air Movie

This story embraces the imperfections that make us human, offers a way to set ourselves free and asks us all to take a good, long look at the wild birds in the sky.

Watch the trailer here!

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Changing Your Parenting Style – MBFLP 125

April 4, 2016 by Leave a Comment

MBFLP - Changing Your Parenting Style - V

 

Every older sibling, sooner later, will say, “You never would have let me do that!” And they’re likely right. The question is not, does your parenting change, but rather, why, and sometimes, why not already?  This episode we look at four very good reasons that your style might change — and some reasons it ought to!

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MBFLP 102 – Family Life Q&A

October 26, 2015 by Leave a Comment

QandA - V 600x900

One thing we’ve seen since we started this ministry is how often families encounter the same questions, the same problems. You’re not alone, and this episode we talk about several questions we’ve heard recently!

Show Highlights

1:31 – What do you do when fellow church members are hostile toward your parenting decisions?
5:40 – How do you manage bullying, including in your own home?
10:47 – When should you begin handing over personal responsibility to your budding adult kids?
15:24 – What should I do, now that I caught my 10-year-old watching sex on YouTube?
20:09 – What’s your decision process for extracurricular activities, especially for younger kids?
23:13 – How do you survive parenting an active little boy?

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