Helping Dad Connect With The Kids – MBFLP 259

A reader asks: “How can we help dads connect with their kids?”

Moms seem to naturally connect with little ones – even before they’re born! It’s not so easy for dads, though. More than one has said, “I can’t communicate with this baby – I’ll let Mama handle it until he’s six or seven, and can understand me.”

That may be common but it’s unnecessary and really, it’s giving up precious time in your child’s life. It’s true, you’ll have a different relationship when they reach that age, but that’s true for every age – and the longer you put off your child, the harder it might become to build bridges later.

So what can be done about it?

First off, don’t let it become a source of contention between husband and wife. If she raises the issue, he needs to step back a bit and ask, “Lord, is it true?” rather than getting defensive.

Recognize that “connecting” isn’t magic and mystical – it’s just a matter of spending time and interacting with your kids.

Train yourself to be intentional about “dad time.” Hal used to de-compress on the commute home, trying to mentally close the office door behind him and re-focus his mind on his roles of husband and father when he got home. That’s not obvious when you’re working from home, though – you have to remind yourself to step away from work and notice your family around you.

Practice some self-denial. The world really plays on our natural desire for our own needs and interests. Certainly there’s a need for some rest and recuperation just to keep yourself healthy and strong! But being available for your children’s needs means your own will have to wait sometimes. Patience is a fruit of the Spirit – it should not surprise us that we don’t naturally abound in it! (continued … )

Disciple Like Jesus Did

Take your kids along when you can. The American theologian Jonathan Edwards had eleven kids and responsibility for several churches in colonial New England. Whenever he traveled to another village, he took a child along. Even when they’re very little, Dad can bring along the baby or the toddler when he runs an errand. Take the opportunity to talk with them about what you’re doing – even if they can’t talk back, they’ll grow accustomed to your voice and they’ll learn more than you realize!

Invite your kids into your work. Men seem to communicate better shoulder-to-shoulder – working together on some project. Whatever task comes to hand, ask one of your kids to join you – “Come on, let’s change the oil on the car,” or “Let me show you how to unstop a toilet.” Allow for additional time and distraction; it won’t be as efficient as doing the job solo, but it’s important time for training and relationship. What if they’re not interested? Keep asking, and sometimes, don’t give them the option – just bring them.

Jesus trained His disciples this way – He lived and worked with them, and He explained and asked and answered questions as they came alongside Him in ministry.

And don’t be shy about inviting yourself into their world, either. “Hey there – whatcha building?” “I haven’t read that book – what do you think about it?” Initiate conversations! Ask open ended questions. Assume that they can understand and respond, and see if you can draw them out.

Remember that you can’t schedule a heart’s opening – you have to be there when they’re ready to share. That means the time you invest simply being with your children and interacting with them will open doors and opportunities for deeper conversation and counsel.

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What’s A Dad Supposed To Do – Catching Up With Michael Somerville

What Is A Dad Supposed To Do? With The Real Kathy LeeI am back from the cruise with Grace (we had a wonderful time) and in Cincinnati for the GHC convention. This was a great time to catch up with Mike Somerville with Tapestry of Grace! I adore Michael and his family (Jessica and the girls). They are a beautiful example of to new homeschool families. As second generation homeschoolers, they have lived in this crazy world for some time now and have an interesting perspective to share.

Today, Michael shares his thoughts on a Father’s role in homeschooling. I love his ideas and think that every dad could benefit from listening to what he has to say. If you are a mom, don’t think this episode isn’t for you. It is. Take a listen and think through the ways your man can support you on this journey. An honest conversation about your needs can help your man know what his role should be.

Check out Tapestry of Grace and their amazing curriculum at www.tapestryofgrace.com.

This week the upcoming film, LIKE ARROWS, is sponsoring our podcast. LIKE ARROWS explores the joys and heartaches of parenting with a story that spans over 50 years. Join us in theaters across America for a special 2 night showing of LIKE ARROWS followed by exclusive after-show content with the film-makers, including celebrated faith-based film-makers Alex and Stephen Kendrick as well as FamilyLife Today’s Dennis and Barbara Rainey and Bob Lepine. You’ll leave encouraged and equipped with powerful next steps to make Christ the center of YOUR parenting.

LIKE ARROWS will be in theaters for two nights only, MAY 1ST and 3RD. To view the trailer and find theater info, visit LIKEARROWSMOVIE.COM. If you missed the movie in theatres be sure to check out the Digital, DVD and Blueray versions on the website, LikeArrowsMovie.com

Blessings!

Say YES and have a great week!!!

Thanks for listening. If you have topics you would like for me to discuss or people you would like to hear from, let me know. Just email me at kathy@thehomegrownpreschooler.com or shoot me a message on social media.

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We’d like to thank our Ultimate Homeschool Radio Network sponsor, Like Arrows!

FamilyLife’s first feature film LIKE ARROWS, explores the joys and heartaches of parenting with a story that spans over 50 years. Join us in theaters across America for a special 2 night showing of LIKE ARROWS followed by exclusive after-show content with the film-makers, including celebrated faith-based film-makers Alex and Stephen Kendrick as well as FamilyLife Today’s Dennis and Barbara Rainey and Bob Lepine. You’ll leave encouraged and equipped with powerful next steps to make Christ the center of YOUR parenting.

LIKE ARROWS will be in theaters for two nights only, MAY 1ST and 3RD. To view the trailer and find theater info, visit the link below. If you missed the movie in theatres be sure to check out the Digital, DVD and Blueray versions on the website, LikeArrowsMovie.com

Visit here to learn more.


 

Building or Re-Building – To Become A Better Husband – MBFLP 170

Our sons face particular pressures on their way to becoming husbands – and fathers face some of the same issues as they live out their own vows! In the second part of Hal’s presentation to a recent men’s conference, he’s talking about the reality of both the temptation and the grace to resist it or if necessary, to repent and recover from a fall. It’s another look about being intentional about preparing our sons to be effective and godly husbands!

Want to know more about our new book, Love, Honor, and Virtue, and how it can help you teach your son about Biblical sexuality and equip him to walk with integrity? CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE! 

Homeschool Dads – MBFLP 142

 

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“How can I get my husband more involved in our homeschool?”  It’s a common question but there are a lot of things below the surface – and we’d say that no matter what he’s doing, if he’s married to a homeschooling mom, then he’s already a homeschooling dad! This episode we unpack the concept of Dad’s part and involvement in the kids’ education from a Biblical and always, a practical perspective, and we offer some encouragement to both of you —

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