Peacefully Parenting the Spirited Child

Let's talk about the struggles of peacefully parenting the spirited child, plus practical strategies to end the power struggles once and for all. #parenting strong willed child #motherhoodIn this episode of Peaceful Mom Talk, we’re going to talk about the struggles of peacefully parenting the spirited child, plus practical strategies to end the power struggles once and for all.

What is a spirited child?

A spirited child has sometimes been described as “difficult” or “sensitive” or “hard-to-parent.” Spirited children can be very energetic, questions authority, engages in power struggles, etc.

You may have a spirited child if you’ve tried everything, but they still don’t listen or obey.

So how can we support our spirited child and bring more harmony to the family?

Let’s be intentional about how we speak to our children. Spirited children often receive more negative messages than average.

One thing we can do is put ourselves in their shoes to imagine how it feels to be barraged with negative messages. Then, we can be intentional about replacing negative messages with positive ones.

We also must stop comparing. Each child is made in the image of God. Each child is unique. When we compare our child to others, that really does damage to their self-esteem.

As parents, we must have the faith that our spirited child will be okay.

The thing is, the same qualities we worry about with our kids, we admire in adults!

An adult who is energetic, confident enough to question authority, persistent..those are great qualities to have. So shifting our perspective a bit to view these traits as a good thing, rather than something to be admonished.

We must also be careful to notice the good in our spirited children.

Most of the time, we notice when they’re doing something “bad” or “wrong” and we call them out on it. But we must also be careful affirm our kids and notice when they’ve done something well.

Power struggles in the spirited child

We must let our spirited children have some control.

If you’re a mom who likes to be in control, you probably enter tons of power struggles with your child. A spirited child doesn’t like being told what to do and how to do it.

We need to consider giving them the freedom to get things done their way. If you try to force a spirited child to do something your way, they will resist.

Understand that many times, defiance and frustration equals anxiety. Anxiousness is sometimes hard for children to verbalize. When we have a child who experiences anxiety, we must be very careful not to name-call or be overly harsh with them.

We have to try to avoid labels like “rude” or say things like, “what were you thinking?!”

Resources for parenting the spirited child

Jesus, Mommy, and Me Facebook Group

Self-Control for Moms: 8 Ways to Stay Calm Instead of Losing Your Cool

 


Join Marianna Chambers as she talks about practical ways to become a more peaceful parent. Having children is a wonderful blessing, but it can also be quite stressful. Every day we hear from moms just like you who are struggling to be the gentle parent they want to be. Moms desperately want to raise their children on a firm foundation of love, but those sweet kids sure know how to push our buttons. (And boy, do they push them!)

Marianna Chambers is a counselor, parenting coach, blogger, homeschool mom, and best-selling author. She’s passionate about supporting and encouraging moms. You can follow her on Facebook and Instagram, or read her blog here. You can also join her private Facebook group for Christian moms on a peaceful parenting mission.

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