Time Management For Parents | Replay

A Production of the Ultimate Homeschool Podcast Network.

time management for busy parents
Time Management Parents Episode 412

There is hope! Are you ready for time management that will help you to reclaim your day and feel good at the end? Is this too good to be true? No, it is a reality, and if I can do it, you can as well. How does it happen? Well, very easily with one sheet of paper and four squares. Today I will help you figure out the main issues that steal your time and the hope on how to reclaim it.

Thanks to our sponsor CTCMath, a wonderful Math curriculum for the entire family of school-aged children. This one-stop shop has grades K-12; check it out. Homeschoolers can save 50%!

Let’s get our time management back!

Does your day lack focus? Are you overwhelmed with the shuffling of papers, trying to get school “done,” and keeping up with the household chores? You can see why there is such burnout among moms, especially moms who homeschool. Even at the beginning of the year! I have to say I struggled with this for many years, and it left me feeling tired, defeated, and like I wasn’t getting anything accomplished each day. I felt like a young mom with little children. If I kept everyone safe by the end of the day, it was a win!

However, I wanted so much more. Especially for those who are new to homeschooling or even if you are a pro, you need the help that comes from getting all of your ducks in a row. Let me cut to the chase here. I was out of time because my time was managing me instead of the other way around. What was interrupting my day? What’s getting in the way of time management?

Easy, three things:

  1. Talking on the phone (substitute social media here and texting).
  2. No set schedule for household chores.
  3. Disobedient kids

I had a defeatist attitude and could not wait until my husband came home so I could dump all of my daily woes on him, and guess what? That didn’t work out too well. My husband ran his own business and often needed my help to do the payroll or help with management and the details of filing payroll taxes, filling out forms, and so much more.

Fast forward, and we raised five kids and have not one but three businesses that we run out of our homes successfully. How did this happen? Believe me, it was not overnight, but now I can share those tips and techniques with you, and these are even better than what I had in my toolbox at the time.

Rules are made to be broken, but sometimes you can look at them as good suggestions, so take heart as I share some quick ones with you.

  1. Just because you get an idea, it does not mean you have to act on it right now. Write it down and look at it at lunchtime or after dinner, and plan for it. Quickly one thing I do not do, even with a business, is looking at emails in the morning – emails such the life and my day away from me. Unless I have planned for this, I don’t do it until after lunch. People who really need to get hold of me quickly know how to do this. Everything else can wait.
  2. I learned my time wasters. See number one – but there were others. I let myself get sidetracked, and once I learned the keys to keeping myself on track, it worked.
  3. Make a plan and stick to it – I know, for those of you kindred spirits that are spontaneous. But believe me, it works.
  4. Every self-help book or how to get organized is not going to help you get organized if you refuse to do what it suggests (same with this broadcast)
  5. Seek help when needed.

I think that is important to note that many times we think an issue is one problem when it is really something else. Another issue with time management is that we have false expectations or, perhaps, no expectations at all! So first, it is homework time. I am going to encourage you to stop this recording and write out your most pressing need and what you hope to accomplish. What is your main expectation? Is it a peaceful home? Is it happiness that surpasses all understanding? Is it kids that get along, laundry washed, dried and folded, and put away in one day? Is it meals planned? What is that? What is important to you?

So the first thing to do is look at your expectations, hopes, and dreams and break them down into a day, week, month or even a year. Remember the old saying, “Rome wasn’t built in one day.” But I am going to add my Felice twist here –  “But the fires that destroyed Rome were set on purpose.”

What fires are you setting for yourself? I’ve looked at my expectations and goals and realized that they were so grandiose and my expectation so unattainable that I was setting myself up for failure. It wasn’t going to happen even with a household of full-time employees! So, let’s get realistic. I’m not going to tell you the platitudes I’ve read like, “make every minute count,” or “delegate,” or “make easy-to-serve meals.” This is a duh, duh, and double duh. We are talking about surviving the day here. But what I will tell you is that you need to use what you have on hand.

I’m an author, which I do believe most of you know, and years ago, my daughter wanted to write a novel. I told her, “Christina, I don’t know how to write a novel,” and she said, “Mom, we are homeschoolers. We will figure it out.”

Moms and Dads, if you are listening. You may or may not be homeschoolers – but if there is something you want to do, you can figure it out. The one novel turned out to be three and sold in catalogs such as Christian Book Distributors, currently on Amazon and my website, MediaAngels.com, and have been around the world. We figured it out.

Time management is what is important to you. The list usually looks like this:

  1. Need to manage the kids.
  2. Need to manage the home.
  3. Need to teach school (for those who are homeschooling.)
  4. Need time with my spouse.
  5. Need to keep my sanity.

Kids always seem to be number one when they should not hold that revered position. As a Christian, the first thing that should be on the list is a time of prayer. I’ve talked about this before, but the days I did not wake up, grab a cup of coffee, my Bible and have a short prayer session with the Lord was the day that all heck broke loose.

So, we need to rearrange the list and have it look something like this.

  1. Keep my sanity. Begin the day with God.
  2. Time with my spouse – figure out when to have a meaningful conversation, spend time and date night even if it means to put the kids to bed and grabbing some popcorn and watching a movie at home.
  3. Manage my home. What is pressing? Laundry? Food? Use your weekends, bulk cook, and freeze. Just like a copy machine is a blessing to every homeschool family, so is an upright or chest freezer.
  4. Manage my kids. Mean what you say and say what you mean. Follow through. Practice good behavior. If this means having your kids repeat after you, do it. I have several audios on this topic, and I also have audios I have created for the kids. See the links below. Have your kids listen to them. Side note here – Tell your kids you are on the same side. Sometimes I think we are in a battle, and the kids need to know there is one leader, it is you as a parent, and the troops need to file in… if you do not have a set of consequences this is important to think about. Ahead of time.
  5. School! Yes, this is last. My kids learned despite my beautifully created curriculum or lessons. Read, read, and read. If you want your kids to learn life lessons do it in books, if you want your kids to learn math get a curriculum. I have a series of character-quality free downloads I give away every month on the Ultimate Homeschool Podcast Network, you can sign up to get them and past sets are for sale on my website at MediaAngels.com. Why is this? Because prior to the 1960s, character was infused and morality in schools, families, and churches. Now, it is all revisionist and secular. Interestingly I read a quote recently from a past president that shocked me. In the words of John Adams: “Our Constitution is designed only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate for any others.”Friends, this is the key; we must bring morality and all that is good and holy into our homes. If that means restricting screen time, do it – if it means only watching good movies, get Pureflix. I realize this is a challenge for some of you, but I have faith in you. You can do it!

Lastly, the key here – how to do it how to get organized. Fast Track.

  1. One week at a glance. Take a sheet of paper and draw a horizontal line and a vertical line. So, it has 4 squares. Faith, Kids, School Household. You can use different headings on each of these squares for whatever you want. This is an overall sketch of what you are going to do and accomplish. The weekly goals if you will. You will not get detailed with the kid’s schooling, other than maybe to put a time frame, or perhaps books you are going to read as a family, etc.
  2. Square one: Faith you can add spouse there as well. But first, you need to get right with God. You need to be filled up before you can pour into others. My show – AFewMinutesWithGodPodcast.com
  3. Square two: Kids – what are your overall goals – is there something in particular or one kid, in particular, that is the squeaky wheel that needs help. Whether it is academic or discipline. At a time of war they always went after the leader, so if there is one child that is leading the others astray begin there.
  4. School. Once again the overarching here – do you have a field trip, are you going to do a science experiment, watch a specific video -put this on your list.
  5. Household. When are you doing the laundry, prepare meals – you can have a start time, etc … list it here:

Whatever you use make it work for you! Make it your own. I really do believe you can figure this out and reclaim your time. Time management is you managing time and making an effort to not allow it to manage you!

Resources: Past Vintage Homeschool Moms Podcasts and Show notes to help you!

  1. I have several past podcasts and if you look at the show notes page, you will see links to download a bunch of forms!
    1. Here is one on Homeschool Forms and another on
  2. Last-minute Christmas prep – contains a 4-square planner
  3. Running Your Home Like a CEO
  4. Easy Way Planning link here

 

 

Special Replay | Easter Traditions

A Production of the Ultimate Homeschool Podcast Network.

Easter Traditions for your family Easter Traditions ~ Episode 464

What are those special Easter Traditions you share as a family? In this episode, with Felice Gerwitz and Crystal Niehoff, you will learn that many Christian families have a diversity of ideas on how to celebrate this holiest day of our Lord’s resurrection.

Welcome to Crystal Niehoff who along with her husband, Kevin, an Army Chaplain hosts the History For Christian Teens podcast on the Ultimate Homeschool Podcast Network. Be sure to subscribe to their wonderful show for teens (and tweens can listen in as well!).

What makes Easter special? Remembering the time of the life, death, and Resurrection of Our Lord Jesus Christ! This is a day of celebration for many families and it is more than cute Easter bunnies and chocolate. What makes Easter special in your family? If you have not given it thought think about this, and brainstorm with your family.

  • Some Easter Traditions:
  • Lent (celebrated by Felice’s family 40 days before Easter).
  • Resurrection Eggs – Tokens with the remembrance of Easter for children. Plastic eggs contain a symbol the depiction of something that represents Easter with a guidebook.
  • Good Friday – suffering, and death of Christ.
    • Felice’s family fasts from all meat on Fridays leading up to Easter. We also attend church on Thursday and Friday before Easter.
  • Sunrise Service. Crystal’s family attends (her husband officiates)
  • Easter Vigil – Saturday evening before Easter. Evening service with Scripture readings from Genesis to the Resurrection.
  • The best Resource is the Bible
    • Four Gospels have a different perspective
    • Older teens can read the Gospels and compare the Bible account
  • Thankfulness is not just for Thanksgiving – Easter is a great time to be thankful.
  • Easter is the eternal lesson for celebrating the gifts of the sacrificial love of Christ.

Easter Traditions do not need to take much money (See Easter on the Cheap, last week’s Vintage Homeschool Moms episode). The most important thing to remember is the time we spend with our family can not be replaced.

Special Replay | Top 10 Faith Building Activities

A Production of the Ultimate Homeschool Podcast Network.

Having fun and learning while teaching the faith, yes! Faith-building activities are discussed, as well as ways to help your children see the spiritual connection between faith and the Bible.Faith Building Activities Episode 325

Having fun and learning while teaching the faith, yes! Faith-building activities are discussed, as well as ways to help your children see the spiritual connection between faith and the Bible.

So, we all want to help our children grow in the Lord; in fact, the Scriptures tell us this Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. And of course, Deuteronomy 6:5-9 Douay-Rheims 1899 American Edition (DRA)

Scriptures as Faith Builders

Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with thy whole heart, and with thy whole soul, and with thy whole strength. And these words which I command thee this day shall be in thy heart: And thou shalt tell them to thy children, and thou shalt meditate upon them sitting in thy house, and walking on thy journey, sleeping and rising. And thou shalt bind them as a sign on thy hand, and they shall be and shall move between thy eyes. And thou shalt write them in the entry, and on the doors of thy house.

There are so many more Scriptures as well! However, the most amazing thing I’ve learned, and I am sure you’ve experienced this, is that our kids pick up our worse habits! And, I’m sure it is because it is the ones that are modeled the most – yes, I’m talking to myself here as well. But the good news is that if we model great behavior, praying, reading our Bible, and doing Bible Study, the kids will also pick up our habits.

Prayer as a Faith Builder

First, stop and pray. Ask the Lord how best to teach your children. Ask the Lord to help you to find those teachable moments that bring home the love and compassion the Lord has for each one of us and especially His unconditional love for us!

You know, when you look at other religions outside of Catholicism and Christianity, you find that the gods that these faiths worship require different things. Some require obedience and submission, others require worship or ritualistic sacrifice. Our God only requires our obedience and love, and He returns His love to us.

Christianity is the truth. It is the real thing. It is not a falsehood. And, with that comes an amazing responsibility to teach our children and share the good news.

Here are my top 10 favorite Faith Building Activities:

The First 5 Faith Building Activities

  1. Attending Church
  2. Praying as a family – before meals, in the evening.
  3. Daily praise reports – what are we thankful for each day? We do this every evening after our evening prayers or devotionals
  4. Reading the Bible – and add a journal for older kids, be sure to check out this podcast on Teaching the Bible
  5. Listening to good Christian audios: Such as Christian music, or teaching audios like Adventures in Odyssey

And 5 More Faith Building Activities

  1. Watching good Christian films, for example, on sites like PureFlix.
  2. Story Starters: make a list of questions such as: What would Jesus do? Give them different scenarios, such as when mom asks you to pick up your clothes, help with the dishes, or do chores in general.
  3. Games that teach Christian concepts – https://childrensministry.com/10-active-indoor-sunday-school-games/ One we use to play as kids focused on the need to trust. What you would do is have someone stand in front of an adult and tell the kid to fall back. Most of the time, kids just can’t let go. The idea is that God is there all the time for us, and we need to let go to feel his arms around us, His embrace. Another fun game that was in the handout link on the show notes is giving two different kids a set of combination locks. One is given the combination, and the other isn’t. One will struggle, and the other will open the lock easily. The point here is to show that when we try to do things on our own, without listening to God, we struggle. But if we listen to God and follow His instructions, things will go so much easier.
  4. Acts of service. Helping at a food kitchen, collecting clothes and gently used toys to donate, visit the elderly at nursing homes.
  5. Memorizing Scripture and Prayers.

Remember

Friends, remember that the best way to teach about our faith is by demonstrating your love of God to others and setting an example. I pray that this podcast has been helpful and ask that you share the show with a friend, give me a star rating on iTunes or any podcast app where you listen, and please join me next week when I discuss helpful tips for parenting.

 



Special Replay | Best Ways To Nurture Relationships With Your Child

A Production of the Ultimate Homeschool Podcast Network.

Let’s Talk About the Best Ways To Nurture Relationships With Your Child

Podcast Title: best way to nurture relationships with your child

Special Replay | Podcast # 157

The experts are in the house!

We will learn about the best ways to nurture relationships with your child! S

Whether you have one child or multiple children, we all want a good relationship with our kids. We want children who grow up wonderful, happy, and settled in life – and what better way than beginning their journey at home. In this broadcast, we discuss some tips as well as some ideas.

with Felice Gerwitz and Special Guests – Israel and Brook Wayne ~ Family Renewal … and Hal and Melanie Young ~ Making Biblical Family Life Practical

Special SponsorMedia Angels, Inc. – by homeschool moms for homeschool moms

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Show Notes: Best Ways To Nurture Relationships With Your Child

Felice Gerwitz – Tips on the Best Ways To Nurture Relationships with your child

  1. Your relationship with your spouse (single parents – your relationship with the Lord)
  2. Love your kids enough to do what you need to do
  3. Be available
  4. Threatening and repeating parent
  5. Be the type of parent you wish you had

Israel and Brook Wayne – Tips on the Best Ways To Nurture Relationships with your child

Authors of “Pitchin’ A Fit” 

  1. Bring your child close to you when you discuss issues
  2. Correct in a different environment like outdoors on swings (Brook explains this on the audio)

Hal and Melanie Young – Tips on the Best Ways To Nurture Relationships with your child

  1. Little ones are real people
  2. Listen and interact
  3. Show delight
  4. Parenting styles change as they age
  5. Teens – talk them through
  6. Authentic praise
  7. Need to be there for them
  8. God gave us these children – He’ll provide
  9. Pray, repent, and apologize when needed – we all mess up

Photo credit – DepositPhoto.com All Rights Reserved. Copyright Wavebreakmedia

Back To School Tips

A Production of the Ultimate Homeschool Podcast Network.

Back To School Tips by Homeschool Veteran, Felice Gerwitz ~ Episode 474

It is that time, and with the coming of the school calendar, it is time for some really great back-to-school tips by our podcast network founder, Felice Gerwitz. She homeschooled for thirty-one years and in that time learned what worked and what did not work. In this episode, she drills down to the basics that will help your homeschool journey.

Visit my website at MediaAngels.com for curriculum, novels and so much more for your homeschool needs.

Are we excited or dreading the new school year? Yes, it is okay to be nervous but please let me assure you that you will not ruin your children. If you have a heart for spending time with your children and you can openly communicate your needs to them and they can talk honestly to you, all will be fine.

Whenever I’ve listened to a podcast or a talk on the topic of homeschooling I walked away feeling that I would never be able to “do that” or be “that creative,” or accomplish anywhere near the amazing mom speaking. One time I went to a homeschool conference and listened to a mom who talked about teaching American History and then proceeded to parade her children out on the stage in matching period costumes. My mom was an amazing seamstress and I can not sew. Can you imagine how I felt after I left that talk? Years later, when I joined the homeschool speaking circuit and spoke at conferences I met this lady and got to know her well. She is not a super mom but she loves to sew. For her, this was a fun project and for me, it would have been overwhelming. She had her children help with the sewing and taught them more than one thing at a time.

Saying this brings me to one of the most important points I hope you learn today. Work within your abilities and your wheelhouse. What are some talents that you bring to the table? Are you good at art? Is music your thing? Are you a sports advocate? Do you like history, math, or science? What is it that you enjoy doing or teaching? Taking this into consideration what can you easily implement into your homeschool? For the mom who loved sewing, it was teaching her kids to sew and make historical costumes.

Back to School Tips – Do. Not. Do.

  1. Duplicate the public/private school in the home.
  2. Set yourself up for failure by overplanning.
  3. Teach over your child’s attention span.
  4. Talk too much. Lecture only.
  5. Not allow your children to participate in discussions.
  6. Failure to ask enough questions.
  7. Unsupervised learning, no checks, and balances.
  8. Failing to schedule time off.
  9. Lack of field trips.
  10.  No extracurricular activities.

Look over this list and add to it – and the reverse is as follows:

Back to School Tips:

  1. Use textbooks, but as a starting point and/or a supplement. Map out the chapters to complete during the school year and count in time off.
  2. Set a realistic schedule within the timeframe of the school year including the time that school starts and ends.
  3. Teach younger children in bite-sized portions, for example, teach math with manipulatives and spend the time necessary to master skills rather than sporadically cover them.
  4. Keep lectures at a minimum. Answer questions and go from there.
  5. Allow your children to participate in discussions.
  6. Be sure to ask questions, if they can not answer them give them time to research.
  7. Be sure the children are getting assignments completed by checking the work or having them check each other’s work with supervision. If your kids know you are not going to check math assignments or writing projects they may slack off.
  8. Schedule time off and let the children know, put this on a calendar they can access or give them one of their own to maintain.
  9. Plan field trips.
  10. Plan extracurricular activities.

Nightmare Story

I heard a mom share that her well-behaved high school student did not get the majority of his school work finished because he knew she would not check it and when she finally did, she was appalled. So much so, that it delayed his entrance into college by one year. It was a combination of the perfect storm as she had little ones that took the majority of her time and elderly parents that were ill. In order to avoid these types of issues having the child show you the work, every few days is an advantage.

More on the recording.

Check Your Communication

Open communication and checking in with our children no matter what the age is beneficial. Will every child like every book? No, but we have to be willing to find another solution in case something doesn’t work out. In other words, don’t be married to a particular book or curriculum.

One year at a conference the parents were looking for a flexible science curriculum for their multi-aged children and came by my booth. My curriculum is a hands-on Creation Science-based series. There are four books, Creation Science, Creation Astronomy, Creation Geology, and Creation Anatomy.

The parents were both science majors and had high expectations for their homeschool but realized with three children under sixth grade and a baby the options were limited to textbooks for three different grade levels. The parents returned to my booth near the end of the conference and purchased all four study guides plus the activity packs. They reported the next year that the science lessons went extremely well and gave the children a chance to study additional topics.

Adding in field trips was a fun addition. Unit studies do not work for every family but they are beneficial when you are homeschooling various aged children on different grade levels.

Remember at the start of this broadcast I asked you at the beginning of this broadcast what you bring to the table. Your gifts and talents are not wasted in any homeschool setting. Another blessing is to ask other homeschool parents what their skill set contains. One year we needed a degreed scientist to sign off on the county-level science fair entries.

We had registered nurses, two doctors, and one dad with two degrees in science and a science master’s degree. Within our small community of homeschool parents, we were set! We also had built-in judges for our homeschool science fair.

We’ve had plays, art fairs, history and science fairs, sporting events, field days, beach science trips, nature center field trips and so much more within our years of homeschooling. By pooling your resources you will be amazed at all you accomplish.

Bible Crate – Teach the Bible

A Production of the Ultimate Homeschool Podcast Network.

Bible Crate - Teach the BibleBible Crate ~ Teaching The Bible In A Year

Do you want to teach your children the Bible? Today my guest is the publisher of the Bible Crate, from  Good and True Media, Mr. Brian Gallager. He will share with you the importance of storytelling and how the impact of teaching children at a young age about the glory of God is a wonderful addition to any child’s education.

Special guest, Brian Gallager, publisher of the BibleCrate

Bible In Order ~ For Kids

 What do you think about group activities for the family that will teach the Bible in chronological order? Well, today I am welcoming a guest, the co-owner of Good and True Media, Brian Gallager.

Reading the Bible is high up on the list of any Christian, and more so as a parent. One way to learn the Bible is to study it in chronological order. Most children love stories and the Bible is filled with action, intrigue, sin, redemption, and steeped in Biblical history.  When children are presented with a good foundation as well as context, they will remember the main ideas, and as they grow older they will have an appreciation of Scripture as well as the foundation to dive deeper.

Additionally, the Bible should be a focus for any Christian family as a subject of study. The Bible Crate engages the family through stories as well as combining them with activities such as crafts. This set is ideal for any homeschooling family. There are multi-children packs available for bigger families to use

Topics discussed on air.

  1. The importance of establishing context when teaching the Bible
  2. Jesus taught through stories (parables), and the Bible IS a story (and a true one at that!). Teach the story
  3. A way to teach scriptures that are fun and not frustrating as the Bible is dense with meaning it can be overwhelming, even for adults. It’s important to make the Bible accessible to young minds and hands-on through crafts and activities that they will remember later in life with fondness.

Unruly Kids

A Production of the Ultimate Homeschool Podcast Network.

Unruly Kids Just for Kids episodeUnruly Kids ~ Just For Kids Episode

Hey moms, grab the kids, unruly kids if you have any of those on hand. This is a Just For Kids episode of Vintage Homeschool Moms and we are going to tackle the issues of misbehavior and the logic behind getting along with others. So, bring your child along as you listen to my episode here

Visit my website at MediaAngels.com for books, a membership site, character planners, and more. I recommend the Truth Seekers Mystery Series, these three novels are an adventure, and mystery series that will keep you reading until the end.

Okay kids, here is the thing. (And yes, I say “thing” quite a bit.) We are going to talk about unruly kids – and what that means. It can mean many things, but for this podcast, I am going to define it as a kid, that is someone between the ages of five and sixteen – maybe, seventeen. And, if you are younger, that is great, you are welcome to listen.

So, a kid between five and sixteen who does things wrong, but not too terrible. Unruly can mean troublemaker – have you heard that word before? It is someone who likes to make trouble just because they think it is fun or they can get out of work if they do. It is a person who is loud when they should be quiet, or who enjoys (and laughs, even if it is inside) quietly when your brother or sister or friend gets in trouble and you don’t.

Misbehaving is not following the rules, and sometimes you might not know the rules, or sometimes the rules change.

So let me break this down for you, and answer these questions:

  1. I laugh when other people get in trouble.
  2. I like to make my brother or sister cry.
  3. I like to make my brother or sister angry.
  4. I like to get away with making trouble without getting caught.
  5. I enjoy it when people look at me, even if that means I get in trouble.

Let’s stop there – can you answer these questions. If you need to rewind this audio you can, and think about this or write it on a piece of paper.

Now, let’s pretend that I asked your parents these same questions and they answer like this. (read and answer with a yes!

How would you feel if your mom, your dad, or caregiver, let’s say a grandparent or aunt or uncle laughs when you get in trouble, likes to make you cry, likes to make you angry, likes to get you in trouble, and not get caught doing it and likes to have people look at them. Would that be a good thing?

Unruly Kids – Scenario #1

How about this… It’s dinner time. When your mom asked you to set the table you said no, and then yelled that it was not fair and your brother should do it. You decided to throw a pillow at your brother and that made your mom yell at you and tell you to go to your room, which is what you wanted because that means you do not have to set the table and your brother does. At dinner, you get up, without asking anyone if that is okay, and you go to your room because you forgot something there. When you get back, your plate of food is on the floor under your chair. And, the dog is licking the rest of the food from the plate. How do you feel?

Probably not very good. You are probably angry, and rightly so because someone didn’t care about you getting to eat the good food on your plate. Someone didn’t care if the dog ate it instead. Someone didn’t care about what you thought or would feel. Did I forget anything? Is there something else you would feel?

**Has there ever been a time when you were selfish like that? Think about it.

So now let me ask you this – if your mom asked you to set the table and you said no, then you threw a pillow at your brother and got in trouble, how did she feel?

  1. She is making your dinner because she cares about you and the family.
  2. She asked you to help because she thinks you are responsible and can be trusted to carry plates, and other stuff to the table, and that is wonderful!
  3. She felt sad that you did not care to help.
  4. She had to stop what she was doing to discipline you – that is making you go to your room.

So – was it worth it?

I had a son who would get into trouble and when I asked him if it was worth getting in trouble he said yes. He was honest and that is good – but it also showed me that I had to change the way we did things in our home.

Here are the things I’d like your mom, dad, caregiver, grandparent, aunt, or uncle to know.

  1. There is only one boss in a home and that is the adult.
  2. If a child misbehaves and does something wrong, that does not get the child out of work.
  3. If the child misbehaves you may want to consider the child being given some work. (My husband use to call it the work-duty punishment.) There are always toilets to clean, garbage to take out, and the garage to sweep out or clean.
  4. The punishment should fit the crime. For the child who threw the pillow at the other brother, the punishment could be picking up the pillow, setting the table (the first thing that was asked), and doing the brother’s job – for example, if the brother was supposed to help clear the table.

Unruly Kids – Scenario #2

Here is the scene I want you to think about. You are outside playing with your brother and sister. You walk in and it should be dinner time. You do not smell any food cooking, and there is nothing going on in the kitchen. You go into the living room where you see your parents watching some grown-up movie – something you do not like. Your mom is laying on the couch and your dad is nearby with his feet up. They have plates with only crumbs left. Looks like they are already at dinner. Your mom says, “Can you get me something to drink?” which you do – and you and your siblings look at each other and think – “What is going on?” Then your parents ask you to wash their plates. They don’t say anything to you, and finally, you ask, “Where is dinner?”

Your mom hits mute on the TV pausing their show and looks at you with surprise. “Dinner?”

Your dad says, “Oh, dinner. We already ate, did you do the dishes?” Then he asks your mom to unpause the show.

How would you feel? You would probably be surprised, angry, or upset and shocked. Aren’t you happy that your parents don’t act this way?

**Has there ever been a time when you were selfish like that? Think about it.

The next time you argue over a game, or whose turn it is to do dishes, or do a bad job in cleaning up and leaving crumbs on a table, or refusing to help – think about this, what if your parents did the same thing?

Why don’t parents act like unruly kids?

If you want a peaceful home, one where you get along with your brothers, sisters, cousins, and friends, think about being helpful instead of being harmful. When you fight, when you do something that is wrong (pinch your sister’s arm when no one is looking or shoving someone aside,) how does that look? If you are an unruly kid and you are not corrected you may become an unruly adult. Recently a national event showed an adult accidentally nudging a child over with her elbow. I don’t think it was really on purpose, even though I am not a big fan of this lady, but it looked really, really bad on the replays.

Whatever we do often becomes a habit – if we practice a musical instrument or some type of sport we get better and better. If we practice bad behavior we get better at it too.

Do you want to be good at bad behavior? If you do, then I think you answered yes to #5 above – I enjoy it when people look at me, even if that means I get in trouble. If you need attention get it another way, get it because people are saying, “Oh. My. Goodness. William is so helpful to his mom, he is always asking if he can do something useful. or maybe, Alex is so awesome he brought in his mom’s bags from the car and not just his own.” Or “Did you see Ben, help his little brother Michael with his shoes, that was so wonderful.” Or maybe they said, “Olivia is the nicest sister to her little brother Christopher and they play so well together sharing their toys.” Don’t you want people to talk about you but in a good way?

Do you really want to be an unruly kid? If you said yes, you should listen to this podcast again, and again, and again until you can truly say, “No thank you, I’d rather enjoy my life, not make trouble for other people and have fun with my family.”

So, what do you think? I hope you enjoyed this podcast and it makes you think about how you can really be helpful like my two grandchildren, Emma and Samantha who are wonderful helpers to their mom.

 

Conflict & Grace

A Production of the Ultimate Homeschool Podcast Network.

Conflicts and graceFelice Gerwitz discusses ways to identify and minimize conflict in our lives, especially as homeschoolers, with help for guarding the way we react and the key to resolving problems especially among children.

This episode includes a two page printable.

Handout HERE

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Vintage Homeschool Moms

A Production of the Ultimate Homeschool Podcast Network.

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The Best of the Past to Bless Future Generations

VintageHSMomsShowPageJust for homeschool moms. Vintage Homeschool Moms preserves the best of the past while blessing future generations with the fruit that comes from putting God first and using the experience as a teacher. Your host, Felice Gerwitz, is a Christian wife, mother, and educator-turned-homeschool-mom in 1986. She began homeschooling as a trial and never looked back.  Felice’s topics range from home education, child-rearing, enterprising moms, SAHM (Stay at Home Moms), WAHM (Work at Home Moms), and so much more.

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